two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
you should buy a sheep. A) you get an awesome pet. B) free coat
one of my coworkers is shitshow drunk, getting naked. she's about to ride the bull.
i was just going to ask if it would be cool for me to come and have a beer...
it's total chaos here. i may ride the bull... i'll be visible.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
I am soup sandwich. I have been at dAnce party
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
This vodka tastes like I'm not going to class tomorrow.
Oh yea... In other news I've decided to get an external hard drive and start getting music from all the guys I'm fucking... Do you think a terabyte would be enough storage space?
Well pulled into the driveway, and there she was. Kinda like a Vegas version of the mint on a pillow
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
Thats why you dont have a "jubilant gunfire celebration"
AMERICA LOVES YOU. RIDE THAT DICK LIKE PAUL REVERE RODE HIS HORSE SO MANY YEARS AGO
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
Randomize
