ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
hahaha Yeah oh well, she wrote on my facebook wall, That's almost like a digital hand job
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
Fell asleep on the Grass at Lolla woke up in the Brown line. What. The. Fuck.
got delayed, meet you at the bar soon, found a shopping cart, i am now getting pushed to the bar by some guy that was peeing in the alley i found the cart in
For months it was all good and well just having sex. Now, something in me has snapped and I'm dreaming of taking turtleneck Christmas pictures with him. Fuck you, we're going out tonight. I need this.
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
I had so much stripper lotion and body glitter on my glasses I had a hard time driving home.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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