He keeps looking? I tried to shag. I invited him to this table but he went to ze other one! If he shaves his 'tache I would totally hit it.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Fine then. I'll just do all this coke on my own this weekend and die. It'll be strictly your fault.
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
Just found out I own a pyramid. Fuck your good grades, I'm living in my pyramid.
They figured our he was high when he told the manager he wanted a break to go wrap his dick in toliet paper and pretend it was a ghost.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
Its 11am and I'm eating gummi bears and drinking Tennessee honey in my underwear...this is why I'm self employed
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
meow
use your words like a big girl
i ran over your cat.
dude im trying to eat his ass so can you stop for 10 minutes
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize
