good news, i'm not pregnant. bad news, i had sex with ***** last night and i think i'd rather be pregnant
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Ok, but If I make this happen, my first born son gets to fuck your first born daughter
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya but I plan to getting arrested more towards the end of summer
stef broke her leg trying to vault over the coffee table. these olympics drinking games are going to fucking kill us
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
On NPR this morning, farmers are feeding weed to pigs. The result: pot bacon. Life just got better.
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
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