I am I'm going to have heart failure he's peed on my life.
Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just overheard a girl at the next table saying she gave up sex for lent
don't you ever do that...
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Man, jail baloney is awful.
Now one day I will be able to tell my children how a drag queen in a gay bar told mommy that bin laden was dead
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
Just realized my relationship wasn't even Facebook official and I'd already cheated on him. 'Shitty girlfriend' is an understatement.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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