Yours is on the dinner table...mine is in my underwear drawer.
what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
did you mean anything you said last night? i just wnna know
no
well at least you didnt have sex with him. i feel like a proud mother. you always have sex with them.
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
We should bet how many people are going to get alcohol poisoning next weekend and whoever wins gets a free Starbucks.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
I'm going on a new diet. It's called the "eat healthy otherwise boys won't want to have sex with your fat ass" diet. Wish me luck.
I may have tried to encourage people to play a new game I invented last night. I called it Super Quarters. Like regular quarters, only using an AA medallion.
We did it in the bar bathroom and the bathroom attendant sold us a condom. I love Nashville
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
It's like fucking tetris in this bed
well i maturbated this morning, which means the best part of my day has already happened.
My mom purposely got me drunk so I can stay at her house bc "we don't spend enough time together." I blacked out anyway, so we didn't spend time together regardless.
Randomize
