i feel like even strangers are annoyed with me because of how drunk i was last night
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
I will probably be peed on at some point today.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
I think he just caught a duck in mid flight
oh yeah, there may or may not be a large boa loose in the house when you get home.
what's the proper way to say, "I'm sorry for puking on you and your bed mid hook up then going downstairs and fucking your roommate because you locked me out of your room completely naked...?"
it was like a shit fog rolling out of the east to encompass me and have it's way with me
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
I didn't even mind that he came early I just wanted to get eaten out and cuddle
I baked a frozen pizza completely, put it back in the plastic and box, and put it back in the freezer. THAT drunk.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
