I thought smoking would make her look better, but all it did was enlighten me to her snaggletooth
Sounds like a blessing in disguise
my roommate just caught me washing a dildo in the sink.
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just went through and liked all 1,239 of her pictures instead of writing my english paper. don't tell her, i want her to be surprised
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
Sometimes i wish my penis was detachable that way i could take it off sometimes so i wouldnt get into these situations
Please tell me that text was part of your elaborate Brett Favre costume; otherwise, dude, wtf?
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've discovered that regular handcuff keys, sadly, do not work on real police handcuffs.
Yes. Be the home wrecker you've always dreamed of being.
Let's say hypothetically if you were going to put icing on a penis and then lick it clean...what would you ice it with? Not a knife right?
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
Left Las Vegas at 2:30 am, woke up at 11 AM at a Barstow gas station with the Valet from Ceaser' palace snoring in the backseat and no memory of how we got there. I felt like Raoul Fucjing Duke right then and there.
Randomize