do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
Some man just said he would jack off to my hair color.
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
I told him he was my first gentile. He was so flattered.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
remind me to get a blood sugar test this week. I'm pretty sure I'm a mojito away from diabetes.
After the nose/jizz incident i think our relationship can handle anything.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
We had hangover sex and then I called a taxi home. Told him I didn't want his number because, if it was meant to be, we would fuck again. He called me the queen of one night stands.
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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