when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Even the bartender felt bad for me
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I have to take his virginity. It's what God put me on earth for. It's my life mission.
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
Would you feed me pudding while my fake tan dries?
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
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I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
I understand that just don't try to seduce me while making frozen pizza again.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
Christ I forgot how flexible you need to be for a decent sext pic. Jesus.
Lets get drunk. But not too drunk that I can't work in the morning. But maybe drunk enough so we'll make out
Its like your face is a pile of corn and I'm a chicken
...What??
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