I just took a girl with a hip brace and crutches on a date. she obviously can't bone. is it rude to demand a blowjob?
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
There are traffic cones in the living room. One of them is yours.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
I just got fire extinguished by his roommate while we were having sex. That's just taking cock blocking to a whole new level.
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
found glitter on my cock. thank you for bringing me to that dance recital.
I can already almost taste penis in my mouth
At least my fat-chick-ratio has not been that bad this semester ...
Of course it may just be the context. A dish of dog food would look lovely next to your breasts.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
I think the night went to shit after he started sweating and crying about a taco he dropped on the ground 3 years ago. No more blind dates
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