I like it. Barfy the gin-flavoured Assman
So I've been drinking and I told the bf about the gf he almost fell of his chair
he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
ugh. my soul tastes like vodka
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
Just did shots with my boss to warm up for our sales call to Childrens Hospital. I love startups.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
after she rolled over and said 'i'm so glad you're like my gay best friend, love you' then left. did i just get friendzoned AFTER sex??
Hey where the fuck is the rest of my beer? Lets start this day off right
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I'm sorry I crashed your motorcycle and watched you get robbed from a rooftop. Will you please come back or at least drop off my shoes?
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
Randomize
