I spent a large portion of the night trying unsuccessfully to keep hayley (who was wearing a dress and no underwear) from doing handstands, but yea it was fun. the boys had fun
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
2nd semester senior, always drunk. at this point if i don't get a good parking spot, i turn around and drive home
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You had us pull over so you could pee, you proceeded to pee in some random persons front yard while yelling "im not ashamed"
Do not buy whiskey under any circumstances. There should be a UN sanctioned buffer zone between me and Seagrams.
I brought a guy home then decided no. Took him back to the bar and said "I'm going to drop you where I found you. Have fun"
How can someone be so bad at fingering? It's such a simple concept
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
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What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
I do feel like I owe you an apology for trying to fuck your dad last night but in my defense everyone knows I shouldn't drink tequila.
All I know is if i get a free preview weekend of HBO then I am recording Kindergarten Cop.
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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