i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
You know there's only so much I can do with a great personality.
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Drunk me thought he was hot enough to overlook the fact that he had poison ivy and still have sex with him. Sober me wants to know if you have any calamine lotion.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
Found my id. It was in the cats litter box. Seriously what was last night.
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I say this out of love and friendship. Eat ice cream not the d.
I just got his Save the Dave and, to answer your next question, NO I AM NOT GOING TO THE WEDDING OF THE GUY WHO GOT DRUNK AND CAME ON MY CHEST.
Fun fact: nipples work on touch screens. Tell your friends :)
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
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