I've been emailing with a woman. I don't think she's into me, but we've become sorta email buddies. I'm hoping to meet her because on her profile she states she's into 'fisting.' Frankly the thought kinda freaks me out but I'm dying to see what kind of woman is 1) into that and 2) admits it upfront.
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
He told me he wanted to break up so he could get "closer to God."
Does God suck his dick?
But like now everytime I pee I just think... wow I had sex with him on this toilet.
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
Its official, drinking for 15 hours counts as a suicide attempt
No, you don't understand. If the words "stop," "alcohol poisoning," and "regret" aren't in the same sentence by the end of the night, I will have failed this birthday.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
How do we stop her downward spiral?
Wine. For us.
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
Me my naked body. You bring the paints. I expect to be a panther by game time Sunday.
What do I get.
Panthers win you get to fuck the paint off me.
Firstly: alligator costume is happening anyway. But I'll see what I can do about the balls.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
