Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
Don't fret. That vag would have consumed a lesser man.
Currently looking for a new liver on ebay. Struggle.
im gonna put my furry chinchilla vagina on her mother effing nose
He kept telling me how extraordinarily clean my ears were.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
lol i'm looking through my photos and there's this giant section of just dudes wearing murses
Just got a voicemail from a guy referring tp himself "as chest hair guy". If I'm coming home to a intervention I understand.
I'm sitting with my parents watching football and moaned when I saw his shirtless picture. They looked at me weird so I had to turn the moan into a laugh. A sad, really horny laugh.
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
I don't want the fire department to come out here twice in one weekend because of your god damn vape.
Just got the test results back; apparently I'm red-green colorblind. this explains the past 18 years of my life and i'm wondering why i didn't realize this sooner
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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