Currently having a discussion about how bad cheating is with the girl im dating and the girl im fucking. This might be a sign that i need to reassess my life
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
We just had the worst moment of our late twenties.... We just realized we are too old for the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
(This is the second time ive been high enough to decide to run for office)
The Universe is CLEARLY playing a bad joke on your sex life
Sorry I couldn't reference you in my facebook quote. I will redirect any likes and comments straight to my blowjob efforts this week.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
Randomize