some dude just recognized me causeg he had a pic of us making out onvhis phone
The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
what are you wearing?
Just my guilt
New boss looks like john cusack in a collar. Hot. Why do i always want to have sex with priests?
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
She threw up on me during morning sex and now Im pretty sure I just saw a woman die at 7-eleven. This is way too much for a Monday morning
It's official, no more fat chicks or even close to that, my balls are 2 dimentional
when the song champagne showers came on you poured some kids beer over his head... while giving him a lap dance
I accidentally lit my hair on fire and we broke the bed. How was your night?
I am just going to stick my boobs out and hope for the best
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
I would give away three of my own ribs to be able to eat myself out.
...ew
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