Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Nicole vs. Life
Tell her she's as useless as a condom.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
Im watching him eat cream cheese and hot dog buns.
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Sitting on an airplane reeking of booze, sex and shame while surrounded by families coming home from Disney. This is not one of my finer moments.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
Nah nah nah the rules are different on st patty day, drink beer or die. It's like the hunger games but blurrier
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
