Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
I'm still drunk from last night...I walked out for a cigarette with one of the Janitors here and apparently someone took a shit on the stairs...Which makes me wonder...was that me?
bro...we were banging on her floor and her dog walked in and started licking my balls
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
Every fourth of July I get sentimental when I think back to the one where we drove around baked off our asses crashing multiple cookouts listening to Team America's "America, Fuck Yea" on repeat. I miss us.
you're my knight in shining pee-resistant armor
Please tell me why your entire hallway smells like microwaved condoms.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
He's laying next to me passed out dressed as a hooters girl
I bet he's a super pretty hooters girl
A guy was over-the-skirt fingering me on the dance floor and I stopped him to sensually rap in his ear. So that was my Halloweekend
I feel like my life just hangs in the balance of "Yeah I'm probably not doing this right"
I was at a crossroads, dude. Like, do I wanna eat chicken McNuggets or talk about my feelings?
Soooo you're telling me you support us groom's men giving lap dances to willing patrons?
Randomize
