so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
I just watched the quarterback of Purdue get shut down by a girl at a bar. not a good omen
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
Currently behind the bar at some asian place, pouring drinks for everyone with a snake around my neck
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
I just want nice things and good sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
Only you would consider your best friend fucking your boyfriend to be a sign of everlasting friendship
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
So... my daughter's new girlfriend Is the daughter of the girl I dated on and off in college Who ran away because she got pregnant at my house party. My Legitimate daughter Is probably fucking my Illegitimate daughter...
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