"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
You said you were collecting Asians for your Kate Gosselin costume.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
so apparently going to a christian rock concert dressed as Jesus is horribly inappropriate.
I need to go back to work. I've had so much sex since the shutdown started. last night we tried and a little flag came out saying "nothing is left in here try a week later"
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
You don't usually get feedback after a one night stand... But you hit it out of the park. I'm proud to call you a friend.
just move with us, we wanted to get a dog. youre kind of the same thing..
I’m literally watching say yes to the dress, eating fancy cheeses with crackers, and I have orange dark chocolates. All of which is being washed down with merlot. And I’m 100% sure a porno is gonna go down next door tonight. They don’t have a car and arrived via taxi. Happy holidays from motel 6 Pendleton Oregon!
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
Randomize
