hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
i may or may not have been spotted by tourists while getting head in the vicinity of the jefferson memorial
It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
You ever start fucking a girl and realize she kinda looks like your mom?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
her teeth should be alot whiter from all of those blowjobs she gives
If we were to wake in ur bed together, what are the 3 words you would say to me?
Get out now.
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Maybe he meant to say like I love fucking you? But just forgot the fucking part.. That's what I'm telling myself.
There's an owl outside. I feel like he's hooing directly at me.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
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