For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
this whole healthcare thing got me thinking.. without knowing it my parents are now going to be paying for my dealer to be able to live..
Aaaand my life has been reduced to whether I can reach to flush my puke down the toilet using my foot. The answer is yes.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Jsyk, in serious talks of trading blowjobs for soup in bed. I'm sober
He broke the bed, AND shit in the closet. What a way to lose his virginity. What a night.
Oh fuck. There is like a human shit on the sidewalk. I hate this place.
I think I should start a match.com profile and put "robe lounging" as my only hobby
You can't just be this socially awkward and sexually frustrated and jealous as a fucking demon and be expected to stay sober.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
And I got shut down by a ginger. It was a weird night
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
yeah, i thought because of the nature of his job he would have been better at it, but i guess there's a difference between a bagpipe and vagina
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