Okay you're seriously so fucking annoying its like having a baby
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She started acting like she was actually a deaf person...so I went along with it and acted like her interpreter. I don't think anyone bought it.
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
She just texted me that she's horny, then started quoted random music, then telling me everything she regrets. I don't think there's enough tequila in the world for me to deal with her...
the whole bar just wished me luck with my booty call tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
Yeah, but I think it would be a little awkward to explain to Mom that the girl I brought for lunch is not my girlfriend but just a fuck buddy who I met after she hit and totaled my car last month.
If you find me in the bathroom in a fetal position, licking frozen bacon .. I might have Drank a little too much.
I want you to remember that you started masturbating in front of a car full of people. That drunk.
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
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