well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
who are you and why are you in my phone as dr. seuss
two words: fractured penis. two more: emergency room.
I'll put it this way. My grandkids felt that fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
Vodka @ 9pm. Library. Nothing can go wrong, I promise.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
You can laugh all you want but 99 grapes is a lot stronger than what you were drinking.
So did I or did I not flash an entire concert last night?
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
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