White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
I wish you wouldn't refer to your breast milk as "ammunition"
I definitely didn't wake up this morning thinking "i wanna get gang banged today"
Drinking wine out of an empty soup can and watching spongebob squarepants.. I eveb hate myself
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was making tequila spiked Arnold Palmers and murmuring things in Spanish.
I love foreign exchange students.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
you took a picture of the hospital bathroom and sent it to me
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
We had sex and I never took my mets hat off... I feel like Duda knows and approves.
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
When have you ever know me to go too far?
Besides the alcoholism, the HR issues, and getting fired from Best Buy for tackling a display?
Yeah. Besides those.
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