Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I think I'm about to have sex with a second person before noon hehehhe! You're welcome America.
I can't decide if the sex was so good I couldn't move, or if it was me being loaded on all the morphine that they shot me up with at the ER.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
FINE YOU CAN EAT HOT WINGS WHILE WE HAVE SEX
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
I can't trust your balls anymore.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I possibly am a tad bit not really but maybe slightly intoxicated.
That's just how I roll. I drink, then tell people I'm either not wearing underwear or I'm training to be a stripper.
He bought me a bottle of Malibu. I think I could love this guy.
I've loved people for a lot less.
Randomize
