She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
omfg. get on facebook. the science olympiad team had a rave.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
The a/c is broken so they cut a softball size whole in the freezer door. Goodbye deposit.
Second night spent with creepy guy. I either need to change his nickname or stop doing this.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
He asked me to spit in his mouth. I did. Never let me hook up with this guy again.
She wants to fuck me. On a tennis court. In her tennis outfit. Is ring-shopping an acceptable 3rd date activity?
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
So what other shows do you masturbate to? Or is it just friends
I already popped my bottle of Rose and took my boxers off. No can do muchacho
Randomize
