A stripper just got mad at me for saying goddammit. She's in no position to lecture me on morality
You had already cockblocked me. The cops were just an assist.
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
She clogged the toilet and got it out with a seven eleven bag. I tried to tell her no but she was convinced that was the logical thing to do.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
lets just use each other and get past this awkward stage. forget my name.
I just masturbated while eating dinner. Now who's the lazy one
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
Dad's already had 6 Zionist conspiracy rants and moms trying to detect any "dark energies" in my soul. You have 4 days before you return to this shit: ENJOY THEM
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Randomize
