I'm gonna have a badass scar
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Do fat girls normaly have fat that look like a penis by their pussy?
What the hell did you do last night?!
He passed out drunk on top of me. Fully erect. Still inside me. Woke up like 1 minute later, and continued.
the bartender cut you off himself after you started walking on tops of tables and hugging random people
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
Tell Chris I said sorry for yelling "It's my vagina, let me do what I want with it!" at the party last night.
I knew it would be an interesting night when he showed up at my house on a scooter wearing a six foot american flag as a cape.
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
Lesson learned. Kayak oars are not golf clubs....check
Huh interesting. Well thats too bad. Did he catch on?
I doubt it. After sex he sat there naked until the episode of fresh prince (which had JUST started) was over.
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
HOW DID ALL OF US MISS THE OBVIOUS: I'LL SHAKE YOUR SPEARE
He meowed while sucking on my nipple, it got even weirder when he said he was trying to moo.
Randomize
