I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
Can we have fireworks this year or will the ocean explode?
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
Puked in my laptop case in the middle of my nutrition class.
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
You fucked her?! HER?!
She sent me a nudie pic with a bunch of weed nuggets all over her tits...what was I supposed to do? I don't hate America sir.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
NO HOOKUPS IN THE CAR. I will try as i might to practice what i preach, but there are no guarantees.
He handcuffed himself to the keg... D is hooking up with him anyway.
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
I would drive 12 hours round trip for you to have an orgasm, cause that's friendship
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
