I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had to get her inhaler in the middle of fucking...but she kept it in.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
i hope you're proud of yourself! i just had to ask my boss to put ointment on the rugburn on my back. clothes hurt!
You dropped a beer and it was like when wilson floated away. Complete with sobbing apologies
Shit, no womder she didn't wanna fuck me
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
Lack of response to this text gains you a half hour of freedom before I initiate operations to conclude you are not, in fact, comatose. You requested no mercy.
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
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