As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
R you on birth control?
No, why?
...no reason
if someoen knew that someone accidentally drunkly kissed your boyfriend would you want them to tell you/?
followup question: what if both somones were me?
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
It kind if looked like a strap-on dressed up for Halloween.
The last thing I remember before blacking out was passing that sobriety test.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
I might have to quit marching band. It's affecting my drinking schedule
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