Microwaved placenta is very unpleasant.
So yes, he's hot, a scorpio, an artist and a perfect cock. I think my bi train just arrived in gay town.
I'm gonna go out in a limb and say living out middle school fantasies is never a good idea
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
Don't worry. This time I'll get black out drunk so they'll just think it's an American thing.
I blacked out before two in the afternoon yesterday. Now that's a successful birthday.
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
CONGRATULATIONS! You have won: pictures of my nipples!
Girl please we both know I eat his bullshit up like its candy sprinkled with crack
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
I actually feel a twinge of sadness recycling all of our handles... I feel like I'm throwing out some great memories or lack of them because we don't remember
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm too high and old for this...
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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