im surounded by vag. Like smog aound LA, i am suffocating in an atmosphere of pussy
until you tell me otherwise ill assume we're playing "cavity search" the homeland security game to spice up our sex life
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bouncers kicked us out around 3 so we went to the grocery store flasks in hand and asked them to turn up their music...
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
I mentioned your name at this party and some girl started crying.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
Please don't bang more than two exes at a time, just so I won't get confused.
one week and then i'm back on the sexual grind. a party is being planned in my vagina's honor
Ya that dick wasn't worth burning a perfectly good pizza.
You live and learn.
I love millennial parents. One of the moms at the daycare center literally told me she and her husband named two of her kids after batman characters and one after game of thrones
Randomize