Plan B is the new Plan A
You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
Steel Reserve is the RC Cola of alcohol. It's never ok.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
well, i woke up this morning to a note i left myself my dry erase board, "dear you: i had sex with someone awful."
To do list: put blue gatorade in a windex spray bottle. spray it into my mouth in public so people think i'm drinking windex.
i turned my shower on this morning and passionfruit pulp came out. how did you even do that?
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I'm having mini little movies in my head. Like for example. You were talking to a blue whale with jazz man sunglasses, but not the ray charles jazz sunglass. More like sunglasses that are round. Anyway, he has a baguette and stupid french hat. And you , you had your harry potter glasses.
It's midsummers eve. A.k.a. come over so we can get drunk and wear leaf crowns
She said to me, without hesitation, "make me an offer better than my sugar daddy and I'll go with you"
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
Randomize
