theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
There's a girl at 7-11 apologizing for her behavior and asking if she can get her shoes back.
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Her husband keeps getting drunk and making out with me. Good news is I found the strep carrier. Bad news is have strep again.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
You better be watching. There will be a POP quiz. Each correct answer gains you 5 more minutes of the sexual act of your choice
Just don't have "pin the tail on the straight edge" as a party game... Please and thanks...
Woke up laying in the kitchen floor with a cup in one hand and the beer tap in the other. Guess I just needed that one last beer.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
do you remember yelling at the waitress that you were a power bottom?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
Can I color on your dick again?
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
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