if you like me you must not know who I am
i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
there's a booger on my laptop, i suspect it's yours
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
what part of covering your puke with shaving cream seemed like a good idea?
This guy just showed us his webbed feet to prove that his son was actually his son
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
I can't turn off my feet"
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
My dream date: Hotdogs/nachos from the bar & tequila. Is that too much to ask?
As a friend tho, you have the biggest dick I've ever seen
I TAUGHT HER CAT TO SIT. CATS DON'T FUCKING SIT ON COMMAND. BUT THIS ONE DID!
It's basically my crowning achievement.
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
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