y did u give ur computer a hand job?
Tell her she can't have a vagina
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
I DMed the cop that arrested me to come unlock my keys out if my car today
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Well, he was my lawyer and now we get drunk and hook up.
That explains the way he looks at you.
Waxing your own asshole is awkward and difficult at best.
But we made up last night and had unbelievably crazy sex tonight. I legit went blind for like 15mins from him choking me. It was awesome
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
Randomize
