i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Going to bed. I have to wake up early and teach small children. And then have affairs with their fathers. I'm going to get deported.
I mean you were pretty drunk at one point you asked if we could have a glass of water ready for you in case you choked while bobbing for apples, but you said grape juice was preferable. You can't choke on an apple btw
Dude I wanna go on a booze cruise
Dude our life is a booze cruise
But without boats...
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
She pretty much spent NYE measuring dicks, trying to decide which one to take home.
you kept saying how you wanted to mainline bacardi right into your bloodstream. medical school is doing wonderful things to your brain
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
