I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
I just watched Jersey Shore so I would know what rock bottom was when I reach it.
I fucked the bump it out of her hair. just had to let everyone know.
I went to go pee and found a strand of your hair wrapped around my penis.
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I walked home with an awkward asain couple. There was a language barrier but I think we're friends now.
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
You were having sex very loudly, so I felt it necessary to blast the Thong Song, bust out the trusty old airhorn and walk in on you. MY BAD.
You know the force is loosing strength when Darth Vader can't handle his liquor on halloween.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
We left Waffle House and he took off running five miles down the road saying we were "training for the Olympics." And I mean, I couldn't leave him out there like that...
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