Screwed.edu
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
Your dignity remains intact. He, on the other hand, is completely convinced he slept with your cat.
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
its not you its me. and by that i mean i am more interested in having random one night stands with random hot girls then having the same normal sex with u.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
Please don't call my dad a fuckpuppet, I feel like that would be awkward to explain later.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Only you would try street racing in a Volvo.
If I hear that song one more time I will drive to hell and make John Lennon eat my ass.
Randomize
