you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
Dude...I'm drunk from Wednesday stilll.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
i dont know what was worse.. snorting the wasabi or puking on the neighbors dog
You know your in for a great weekend when you buy the booze already in crutches
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
Yesterdays boozy weather forecast has been extended to today
Just got escorted to my 7:45 class by an old woman because I was too hungover to not realize I was four floors too high.
I can tell right now that knowing you will either be really fun or ruin my life
You just gave me the title for the series of our lives. Haha. Chapter 12: the cocaine on the back of the hairbrush
Back at condo with chick. What is the condom situation urgent response needed
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I threw a lamp at you?
Yes, yes you did.
Awesome
Randomize
