People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
hey, here's something you don't have worry about since you're a girl: finding crusty cum in your bellybutton.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
She's the perfect storm when it comes to psycho stalkers
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
Im pretty sure you told the waiter at Dennys last night to take your pants off or show a nipple.
I am so hung over a medically induced coma is beginning to sound appealing.
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
I'll be visiting the rave tower. Prepare your finest boxed wines for my consumption.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
Well my unnaturally hairy chest finally came in handy. It took at least an hour to shave the american flag into my chest but I definitely went America all over that party
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
you should never start the day with a boob text. It can only go downhill from there
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
I'm hung over and my mom made me go to church. I feel like such a sinner.
I need an aspirin and some dignity.
Randomize
