I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
Friends bring friends secret work margaritas. my pink water bottle is in the cupboard
Just doin' what I do best: sitting in a stall in the class building's bathroom, pondering life and exploring deep, dark corners of the internet before class.
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
im that hungover where parking at red lights has to be done
I need to pay that drinking in public ticket, but I also really want to get a spray tan next week... so priorities.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Yeah. I made eggs in a microwave. I think that's an accomplishment this week, MOM.
Idk my boobs are big but i dont think theyre hide a flask in them big..
If you're doing something that makes your best friend lock you in a bathroom you shouldn't be doing it
that guy was staring at your tits.
nah, more like they were staring at him, and his girlfriend, and her less than adequate bosom. they pitied the fool.
point taken, oh mistress of the bosoms.
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
Randomize
