what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
Things got a little weird when he fired up his homemade flamethrower in the living room.
I am assuming I was his dirty Mardi Gras mistake and I can live with that
Made a vodka juice box out of a ziploc bag and a straw for when I drive. Doesn't count as an open beverage container anymore.
after she pushed someone down the stairs to get more vodka we lost her for a while and found her on the pole in the garage pouring water on herself
Lazier than spoon feeding yourself popcorn and debating adult diapers so you don't have to leave the mentalist marathon on tv?
I just yelled at a bunch of girl scouts for yelling "cookies" to loudly. That hungover
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
Yeah. Just jump him. Naked. Claim his dick for yourself.
Like for real, is your junk ok? I have to look after my investments.
I mean, who doesn't have an ex involved with bath salts?
Woke up backwards on a recliner
I really need to stop sending pussy pics if I'm going to be running for state representative in November
Randomize
