I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
None
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
if you need to find her look her up on www.imastupidslut.org
.org?
yeah. they're non profit. helps them sleep at night.
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
Also the McRib is back. Lets get high, dress like cowboys, and eat some McRibs.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
So high, just applauded for a magic trick on Hulu.
So what you're saying is that The Magic Kingdom is ruining our plans to get laid?
UPS just delivered me 30lbs of dried cherries... I shouldn't be allowed online when I take painkillers.
Woke up in a car, do you own a silver car parked a few miles form the house...hope so
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I literally ended up in this basement and was tangoing w my friend and then I peed in a supply closet and had to be put to bed
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Randomize
