i hate sounding clingy, but i just wanted to verify i wasn't an asshole in your mind
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
He plays me like an instrument...he is the Carlos Santana of my vagina.
I can't remember if the bartender cut you off after you broke your glass or after you wished the bar a happy winter solstice during your karaoke number.
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I just racked up a fucking ginormous hospital bill because I came so hard I had an asthma attack
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
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