I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
I just caught Brandon licking the fake chocolate on a smores ornament
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
Just promise me you won't ring in the new decade by clutching onto a toilet
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
dude you had a hot girl interested and took shots together, as soon as it went down the hatch you upchucked on her entire existance..
successful birthday. 2012 rules
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
Oh my god. You have got to get off that breast feeding support group. They're on to you, dude.
Sometimes turtles just really trip me out man
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Being severely attracted to someone you find is your cousin just made my list of top 10 worst feelings
Randomize
