What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
You're being dramatic. You can calm down, or you can piss off. Either way, I ate your burrito.
well, obviously he didn't fuck me for my strong moral fiber.
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
I wasn't talking about him I meant his penis! Its not a pet
Oh. Well it should be. I like petting it.
good morning. i just did a walk of shame in front of his grandmother.
I know I drink too much cuz "ssssjllapph peneinssesss" automatically comes up in my phone now.
I've been drunk texting you for weeks, and you watched me puke outside your house... I say it's time we meet in person.
St. Patty's shenanigans tmrw? I wanna meet dudes lol. Why stop at coronavirus when you can get the clap, too?
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
